oh, and by the way...

The last thing you want to have to do is make a trip to the emergency room when you're a 66-year-old woman having abdominal pain, and then have to admit to the triage nurse and the doctor that you're really constipated and haven't taken a good dump in 4 long days.

But you know us healthcare professionals, we are exactly that--professional--and can handle this problem with the utmost of tact.

After the acute abdominal series x-rays are taken which confirm the presenting complaint of constipation, the doctor orders a jug of Golytely and writes up the following informative and cordial discharge instructions:

"Add water to line on bottle up to line, shake well, and drink through the day until finished or bowel movement occurs. Happy Mother's Day!"